Recently on I Wish They Knew, Mark C. Crowley, bestselling author of Lead From the Heart and The Power of Employee Wellbeing, dropped by to discuss why worker well-being is the new engagement. He argued that workplace growth, belonging, and recognition don’t begin with quarterly surveys or annual reviews. They start with one simple, human question:

“How do you feel about work?”

Why feelings matter more than metrics

For decades, companies have poured resources into “engagement” surveys. But as Crowley points out, these efforts were rarely sincere. “Employee engagement in America and around the world is essentially no better than where it was over a decade ago,” he told me.

The problem? Engagement surveys often focused on how employers could extract more effort from workers, not how employees actually experienced work. Crowley’s research shows that up to 95% of our behavior is driven by feelings, not rational calculation. Asking people how they feel provides immediate, actionable insights that traditional engagement data simply can’t match.

A wider feedback frame

When leaders ask “How do you feel about work?” they open the door to conversations that touch the deepest needs of employees:

• Belonging. According to Crowley, the number one reason people leave isn’t bad managers — it’s the absence of belonging. “They don’t feel that they belong within the team, that their ideas aren’t valued, that they don’t feel like the people they work with have their back." Feedback conversations should explore whether employees feel connected, respected, and supported by their peers. When most leaders think about feedback, they focus on performance metrics, deadlines, and results. But what if the most important question wasn’t about what people do, but how they feel while doing it?‍
• Career Growth. The shift from “What do you think?” to “How do you feel?” helps managers surface anxieties about advancement. Asking, “How do you feel about your opportunities to progress here?” can spark dialogue about training, coaching, and stretch roles that build confidence and competence.‍
• Recognition. When recognition systems pit employees against each other, trust erodes. “We have to have rewards that don’t cause competition and pettiness and actually reward the team for the performance,” Crowley said. Recognition should affirm contributions in ways that strengthen—not strain—the bonds of teamwork.

Feedback with heart

This small but powerful shift reframes feedback as an opportunity to show how much we care, not just how much we know. Leaders who ask, “How do you feel about work?” show that they’re not only interested in what employees produce, but in how employees experience their work, their growth, and their sense of belonging. Because when people feel cared for, they don’t just give you their effort. They give you their best.

Watch or listen to my conversation with Mark Crowley.

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